March 06, 2003

Pussy Power

Here is an intriguing interview of Chan Marshall of Cat Power, who just released the excellent You Are Free (I think her best album to date) from a website appropriately called Nude As The News (a Cat Power song title from What Would The Community Think?) Here's a preview:
NATN: Do you ever revise [your songs] once they are on the tape?

CM: No. And that is why I have live shows that are really shitty, besides maybe this one person who says, "I'm insane and I want to kill you." Or I might have found out that something really traumatic happened to a friend of mine. That might make my live show a little fucked up because of personal shit. We all have a bad day at work and people make such a fucking big deal about it. What can also make a bad show is when they're not perfect. [If the performances are not] I feel awkward and I don't want to do it, and I want to move on to like going to that place again.

But this is the funniest part...and the part that must have made the interviewer wilt.

NATN: Well, I am one of the principals in the online music site Nude As The News...

CM: Are you kidding? Wait. I might have seen that. That's you? Really? Oh my god. That's amazing. I think I have seen that. Wow. Confess. You weirdo [laughs].

Where Will This End?

In yesterday's edition of Slate, there was a very interesting article about the inability of the Bush administration to play nicely with others. I have no confidence at this point that the outcome of a war with Iraq will justify its execution. Especially when you read things like this:
[W]hen Bush met in January with top Iraqi exile-dissidents, they had a hard time explaining the differences between the Sunnis and the Shiites. The president seemed surprised that the two groups existed, much less that they had conflicts.

Yikes.

March 05, 2003

Trying To Make A Dollar Out of 50 Cent

Mumblers unite!!

From time to time, I have been accused of mumbling words. Usually it's because its not nice to call people "fuckin' fuck fucks" to their face. Have to let those slide under the radar if we are to keep the peace.

Jamaica, Queens mumbler 50 Cent (that's right!! He's cockin' that 9 at your head!! Feel the love!!!), has the number 2 album in the country behind R. "I Swear She Looked 15...I Mean..18" Kelly's Chocolate Factory. (What do they make at R. Kelly's Chocolate Factory? Suggestions?) 50 Cent also has the number one single in the country with 'In Da Club" a.k.a. "Did You Like Tupac's How Do You Want It? (Good!!! Cause Here It Is Again!!)"

50 Cent is so damn popular that even the indier-than-thou kids at Pitchfork are taking their time out to write a mini-thesis on 50's Get Rich Or Die Tryin'.
(Sidebar, your honor: Your honor, we'd like to stipulate that this is the only...we repeat...the only known review of Get Rich Or Die Tryin' that name checks French philosopher Jacques Derrida.)

Anyway, I'd like to throw down some of 50's pieces of wisdom here...so here are some favorite selections from the mass hit "In Da Club."

Go, go, go, go
Go, go, go shawty
It's your birthday
We gon' party like it's yo birthday
We gon' sip Bacardi like it's your birthday
And you know we don't give a fuck
It's not your birthday!

Yeah...this lets us know that if it was my birthday, 50 would be fuckin' shit up cause it ain't even my birthday and my shits already gettin' fucked up...the Bacardi is flowin...but I ain't sippin'...I'm chuggin'...ummm...once, twice, three times a fuckin' lady, my shits gettng fucked up. Shit...I wish it was my birthday.

You can find me in da club, bottle full of bub
Look mami I got the X if you into takin drugs
I'm into havin sex, I ain't into makin love
So come give me a hug if you into gettin rubbed

Can I get a t-shirt that says this?

I think its apparent that when you party with 50...you party harder than Andrew W.K. I mean, 50's bringin' just about everything. He'll give you champagne...he'll give you drugs...he'll fuck you...but before he fucks you...he'll give you a nice hug....then...50 will indeed fuck you....gently, I'm sure.

If you watch how I move you'll mistake me for a playa or pimp
Been hit wit a few shells but I dont walk wit a limp

People tell me that by the way I move, they mistake me for a "playa or a a pimp." I laugh...and say "No...I am not a pimp nor a player...but I am a whore." By the way, 50's being modest...getting shot nine times is more than a "few shells."

Now shawty said she feeling my style, she feeling my flow
Her girlfriend willin to get bi and they ready to go

...If I had a nickel for everytime the ladies were "willin to get bi" after hanging with me and feeling my style and flow...well...(ahem) that's a lot of nickels. Oh...wait a sec...does this mean...like "bi" with me? Oh...

you can find me in da club...

The Eight Songs I Listened To On My Way To Work On March 5th, 2003

"Fuck This Band"--McLusky from McLusky Do Dallas
"Baby Doll"--Cat Power from You Are Free
"Here"--Pavement from Slanted & Enchanted
"Save Us S.O.S."--Hot Hot Heat from Make Up The Breakdown
"Old Dominion"--Enon from High Society
"Clark Gable"--The Postal Service from Give Up
"Water and Sleep"--Mirah from You Think It's Like This, But Really It's Like This
"Champagne From A Paper Cup"--Death Cab For Cutie from Something About Airplanes

Pimps and Ho's Gettin' Involved

When Ted Nugent speaks, I listen.

So it was with intense interest that I read Nugent's remarks on Fox News Channel's Hannity and Colmes about the new Governor of Michigan, Democrat Jennifer Granholm.
NUGENT: Unfortunately, the preponderance of [Granholm's] votes came from pimps and whores and welfare.

COLMES: Excuse me?

NUGENT: I'm telling you that the pimps and the whores and the welfare brats love policy that benefits...

COLMES: Ted, That's ridiculous.

NUGENT: You can check out the statistics.

COLMES: You don't know who voted for her. That's ridiculous.

NUGENT: I'm afraid I do.

COLMES: You were in the booths with these people and you want...

NUGENT: No, Alan, I wasn't in the booth with the people. I know that those blood-suckers in our society love politicians who will give them blood-sucking opportunities.

COLMES: I don't believe that was the platform she ran on, Ted.

NUGENT: I believe it was.

COLMES: You're making an absurd statement.

NUGENT: Well you can call it absurd. I think the evidence is irrefutable.

Let me tell you, if the pimps and the whores can make it to the polls, certainly everybody can play a part in our great democracy.

March 04, 2003

Inter-Matter Sexual Habits

a tree and a television set do the nastyI have always enjoyed the website Street Mattress. I have submitted some pictures to them now and again. At times I completely forget to bring my camera when I'm walking around. I miss a lot of good street mattress photos.

This photo on the left is from a while back. It's just been sitting on my computer...waiting to see the light of day. It was taken some time early January, at the point when the Christmas tree becomes the unwanted roommate, a friend from back home who has outstayed his welcome and now just gets in the way of just about everything.

A Christmas tree and a television set, reclining, maxin' and relaxin' in the East Village, waiting for one of them to make the first move. The TV was waiting to get turned on as the Christmas tree laid out in hopes of becoming erect once again.

Get a room.

It's Faannnntttassstic!!

the subway operates with lightsWe haven't had a picture in a while. I have been lazy. So here we go. This is a cropped photo of the F coming into 2nd Avenue. Field Mouse is actually to the right. But...no longer.

Tonight, courtesy of Blah Gger and his bosses, Field Mouse, Blah Gger and I sat 20 or so rows away from courtside at the Knicks-Cavs game. The game was faaaaaaannnnnnnntttttassssssstic.

Actually no it wasn't. The Knicks ended up winning 89-80, but nobody really deserved to win this one. What a nightmare. I'm shocked that the Cavs shot 41% from the field and the Knicks 37%...it seemed a whole lot worse than that. Ricky Davis and Shandon Anderson had two nice dunks but besides that our attention was turned to how out of sync the Knicks City Dancers were.

On the way home, Field Mouse and I stopped by to pick up tickets I bought on eBay to the Friday Interpol show at Irving Plaza. The guy was nice and all but we had kind of a long extended conversation with him about music in the hallway of his building. A bit awkward of a relationship to have with your scalper.

Field Mouse and I are going to see Idlewild on Thursday at Irving Plaza. In reflection, I am really glad we didn't also get tickets to see Cat Power also at Irving Plaza on Wednesday. Three consecutive shows at Irving Plaza might be a wee bit too much. Plus we've already seen Cat Power once...and well with Chan Marshall's notorious on-stage antics...that might be enough.

I'm going to try to make a concerted effort to blog a bit more often...get a bit more on here...hell maybe I'll even fix the new page. Spring may bring forth better things.

Home Invasions Bring a Trail Of Dead

In an unexpected way, Sunday night is probably my favorite television night. I get to watch the back-to-back criminal madness known as Law & Order: Criminal Intent and Boomtown.

Boomtown has been off the air for a bit while NBC has been showing the Hispanic Sopranos, Kingpin. I'm a bit worried that Boomtown is going to get cancelled because of low ratings. Yet another high quality show would bite the dust.

Anyway, last Sunday I was watching the first Boomtown episode in a while. It was about these guys who for some inexplicable reason invade homes and then sexually torture your entire family. Sounds like this should be on Fox. Or at least cable access.

The first shot of the show after the credits rolled was of two of the detectives (one of which was Dorchester's own Donnie Wahlberg.) walk through the aftermath of numerous bloody sexual torture victims. During these shots some orchestral music was playing.

As soon as I heard it, I said to Field Mouse: "I know this music...what the hell is this?? I own this...shit..."

It took me a while to place it. Field Mouse thought it would be strange that I owned it because "the orchestral part goes on pretty long."

I couldn't figure it out.

However, this morning, through the beauty of the iPod on random, I came across the song from which the music was taken. Surprise.

The orchestral bit is from the title track of Source Tags & Codes by ...And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead.

How funny is that...shots of the aftermath of sexual torture brought to you by ...And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead?

How fitting, eh?

I'm looking forward to when they roll through town here on April 19th at Irving Plaza.